


The Marriage None Expected (But Everyone Wanted)

by WayWardWatson



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: Crack, Dorks, F/M, Fun, Gen, Helicopters, Humor, Kidnapping, M/M, Marriage, Red vs Blue cameo, Sandwiches, WERE GOING TO THE CHAPEL AND WERE GONNA GET MARRRIED, Wedding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-27
Updated: 2013-10-27
Packaged: 2017-12-30 14:29:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 545
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1019757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WayWardWatson/pseuds/WayWardWatson
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In Light of Recent Events: Burnie awaits at the alter, nervous and eager to see his bride.</p><p>He felt like it was a dream come true. </p><p>Nothing could possibly, ever, usually, always, alright maybe, go wrong?</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Marriage None Expected (But Everyone Wanted)

**Author's Note:**

> This is crack - I've done my best. It's made for humor. I really hope you enjoy.

Burnie stood upon the alter nervously waiting for Gavin to appear. He wanted to mess with the well-fitted tuxedo, maybe undo the buttons, but all eyes were on him and he wasn’t about to show those dicks that he was nervous.

Finally the door opened and he suddenly forgot how to breathe. 

His eyes widen and his adam apple bobbed as Gavin Free, Brit of ultimate lankiness, appeared. He wore a long, billowed white wedding dress, and disney-esq gloves that glimmered obscenely so. His arm was wrapped around Geoff’s as Geoff slowly led him down the aisle. 

Millie and Ray, both dressed in beautiful green dresses, tossed red roses down the carpet as Gavin slowly approached the alter. Even though he couldn’t see pass the veil, Burnie could practically imagine the nervous smile painted across that tanned face.

So absorbed in his thoughts, Burnie hadn’t realized that Gavin had finally reached the alter, Geoff letting go of his arm and returning to the pews beside Griffon. Joel nudged Burnie slightly and he blinked, his breath taken by the sudden reality of all of this. He could just barely see through the lace, Gavin’s eyes staring back at him. 

As they said their words, Ryan gave them their rings. Burnie lifted Gavin’s hand, slipping the ring gently on his gloved finger. Murmuring the required words in wonder. 

It felt like a dream.

Burnie lifted the veil, finally sharing the equal look of wonder with Gavin, the space between them quickly shortening, both eagerly waiting for the final words that would link them together till the end. 

"If all opposed to this marriage, speak now or fore-"

"I OBJECT!"

Michael stood up, a flare of red surrounding him, as he stomped up to the alter, the ground shaking under each step.

"Mi-cool?" Gavin asked curiously, shifting closer to Burnie.

"No, NO. Gavin’s ours, not yours!" Suddenly Lindsey dropped from the ceiling, dressed in the splinter cell garb but with a penguin hat on. 

"Exactly! Get your own British twink!" Before Michael grabbed Gavin around the waist and Lindsey grabbed Michael. Gavin shouted for Burnie, hand stretched out as he was pulled upwards towards the hole in the ceiling where a large camouflage helicopter, driven by Jack, hovered. 

Yet, only their fingers brushed together as Gavin was whisked away. Burnie, crumpled on his knees, stared up at the retreating helicopter, his screams of No echoing until he rested his head on the floor, silent. 

"It will be alright, buddy" Joel said softly, his hand grasping and curling around Burnie’s shoulder. 

"How do you know?" Burnie muttered, then looked up. 

Caboose, in all his blue glory, crouched beside him.

"Because you have me and we’ll always be friends forever and ever and ever and ever!" Caboose titled his head. "Right Church?"

"Noooooooo!" 

Burnie sat up, chest heaving, calming down in the cool dark of his bedroom. He glanced at the clock and groaned; 3:45am. He rubbed his hand against his face, he really needed to stop eating those sandwiches before he went to bed, they keep fucking with his dreams.

But, his stomach rumbled, while he was up it wouldn’t hurt to have a quick bite of a ham and cheese sandwich.

As Ray would say; yolo, right?  


End file.
